Sunday, December 24, 2006

I'm ruining YOUR CHRISTMAS.....??????????

Oh that's right, it's that time of year again where I am destroying people's holidays because they actually have to think about their case over the holidays. Well I guess you should have thought of that before you filed in the first place..

That doesn't quite compare to the other caller I have had the pleasure of talking to. Not only am I ruining her Christmas but I am personally trying to ruin her pregnancy as well. I wonder if I should tell her that we are expecting our first in June.... See what she has to say about that?

Where do these selfish pricks get off dumping their crap on me?!?! Isn't it bad enough that I have to read their sob story letters and put up with their rediculous questions? Why must I also bear the brunt of their displeasure at the system?

Suck it the hell up and move on with your lives! I have every intention of having a perfectly lovely Christmas with family and friends. Perhaps when people call back next week (and I know that they will) I will go into detail about how wonderful my Christmas was because I was thinking about them having to slave away and actually take some responsibility for their appeals!

Merry Christmas Dick... we're just down the road a little further into the heart of Lambton County... You two Cap thug.. you know all our love goes out to Watford and Georgetown this weekend!

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Rest in peace Mr. Altman (February 20, 1925 - November 20, 2006)

It is a sad sad day for the entertainment industry…..

We found out that the great Robert Altman passed away. He is perhaps best known for his ground breaking directorial style as best displayed by M*A*S*H

He was an icon and will be dearly missed.

Monday, November 06, 2006

Man.... you can't make this stuff up...

So silly little me is sitting down to read some of the 'odd news' happening around the world while eating my breakfast and what do I come across but this.

Now I understand that people have compulsions so it isn't unheard of for someone to lay about naked in public, nor is it unheard of for someone to masturbate in public. Of course I haven't heard of both happening at the same time but I'm sure it is not a first. The real twist is the concealed weapon.

I know, I know... What made the cop ask if the gentleman in question was concealing a weapon? Force of habit...? Professional demeanour....? Personal experience...?!? Whatever the reason he had the forethought to ask and (hopefully) to his surprise the man informed them that he had a screwdriver concealed on his person...

Ok, yes he had just recently gotten out of prison and it can be tough to get back on your feet and figure out the appropriate behaviour and reactions to situations in public (well as far as I can gather anyway) but I am willing to bet that laying around naked, with an ice pick (yes, turns out it was an ice pick wrapped in electrical tape and not a screw driver) in your rectum, masturbating is not even a normal occurrence in prison. Why he thought it was appropriate to do out in public is anyone's guess.

Besides which, the makeshift shiv hidden in the rectum.....? Seems a little cliché to me...

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Ever notice...

Well, at least I managed to resurrect one of my
posts... Let that
be a lesson to you. If you are tired, don't try to do
anything to your Blog...
You will just end up erasing the whole damn thing
and having to start again from
scratch.. - pm



That when you need to accomplish the most work your desire to procrastinate becomes the strongest?

I mean sure, I have been in a rut at work and yes I am actively seeking out new employment but how does one do it? How does one force oneself to work when every fibre of their being is straining against it?

You lie. You trick yourself and say that it won't really be that bad and then you do about 5 minutes worth of work and then you check your e-mail. Or you read some more of the archives of your favourite new Blog and then realize that half an hour has passed (so much for taking a walk on break today, it just disappeared into the ether of the interweb).

Then you lie again and tell yourself that you will do better this time. And you do. You make it through 15-20 minutes of work and then your phone rings or someone walks down your row in the cube farm or the clock advances by a minute and you get distracted.

Then comes the ultimate lie, the biggie that will let you off the hook for the rest of the afternoon... "I'll take care of it tomorrow". Uh oh...It's out there... like the pink elephant in the corner of the room that nobody wants to talk about. "Now you've done it" you warn yourself. Now not only have you guaranteed that tomorrow is going to be busy but you have given yourself a free pass for the rest of the day. The only problem is that you know all too well that tomorrow you are going to do the same thing all over again until about Wednesday when you decide "well, this week is a write off so I will enjoy myself and start fresh first thing Monday morning...". Thankfully I didn't make it to that point until today. Tomorrow I can justify because I have to walk visitors around.


Monday doesn’t scare me. I know it will be exactly the same as the Mondays before it. One of these days I will find a lie that works and stop living by the old axiom "Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday." For you see, tomorrow never comes. It always becomes today and the work will always be waiting for you tomorrow.


On that note, with the Internet as my witness, I will definitely get that work done tomorrow…